Send that shit right now! Ten bucks. I have to change my pants. You can hear me, right? Weve got to round them up, weve got to contain them. And Ben Afflecks like, Are you crazy? Because of this weve been killing each other for centuries. Are you kidding me? And then immediately behind my mom, is this little br0wn girl with a mushroom cut. Rajesh Rengatramana How does she make love? Come to New York. Homecoming King, the story of the "New Brown America," is based on true events from Minhaj's first generation Indian-American experience. I did what a lot of early comedians do. Youre going to die, so put it on the tombstone. Its Jon. Fox News has taught me that. [laughter] Dont you know what this means? Im crushing life. Verified reviews are considered more trustworthy by fellow moviegoers. After reflecting, here are 4 Leadership lessons I learned by watching Hasan Minhaj. Im, like, Maybe this is bigger than me. I love you guys. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. In that moment, I let it go. But then she would go back to India. 7:07. Just like, Ah. And Id look at him and be like, Oh, man. And shes like, Dad, I did not fly out from Philly for this. [laughter] Beena is so legit. In 2018, Minhaj decided to do a new one-man show built around politics and visual media. Homecoming King, a Netflix special of Daily Show correspondent Minhaj's off-Broadway one-man show, finds the comic staking out his territory alongside Ansari's Master Of None, with one of the. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website. Isnt there something bigger that unites all of us outside of race, color, creed, class? Please dont say anything. Im walking to my locker. Calligraphy! Im home. Whoa! [raucous laughter]. Im the only br0wn kid at school, Dad is the only br0wn guy at work. Big, delicious sliders, only at your Pizza Hut. Her family is Hindua point of contention for Minhajs Muslim family. I pick it up, and its destroyed. [laughter] Youre not Liam Neeson. Its not rubbing off! I was fucking terrified. Watch Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King | Official Trailer. Were sitting on my living room table. Youre not funny. Hasan Minhaj (The Daily Show, Homecoming King) stops by Utkarsh's apartment to discuss his one-man show "Homecoming King", bringing South Asian American stories to the mainstream and the responsibilities that come it, how things work at The Daily Show, and Hasan talks about his brave, bold and incredibly powerful speech to Congress at the 2015 Long time no see, indeed. [talks gibberish in high-pitched voice] Seven years. Ten syllables. Im fucked. 8.2. Shes like, Everybody has been asking why we didnt go. Youve seen movies. Do you want it? Dont mind if I do. Six puffs, one for each championship. But my mom, shes very controlling. Bethany Reed. Okay. Please dont say anything. And I look at her. And Aisha hates that story. I never knew I never knew if I would do anything more than Pizza Hut. Whats wild is, I never even knew how the whole X-Men Origins story went down. So, Hasan, be brave. Dude, are you going to be a darapok again? Meanwhile, I I didnt go to grad school. Are you fucking kidding me? I go to the airport. So Im looking in the trees, the bushes I look back in the middle of the street, my dad is in the middle of the road sweeping glass out of the road like he works at a barbershop. Hasan bhai! Im like, Yo, kick rocks! I go play tetherball. I understand. He drags in this big box and goes, Aisha, open the box. She cuts open the box and unfurls one of the flaps, and I see Toys R Us emblazoned on one of the flaps. I need you. I've identified my statements in . Im the cure for racism. Thats the nicest Ive ever been dressed, playing Mario Kart. Copyright 2023 US Catholic. We wont be able to verify your ticket today, but its great to know for the future. Do you understand whats about to go down? Status updates, away messages, sub profile, Boyz II Men. Mrs Reed opens the door. I jump off the roof. Compromise? And I didnt know what that meant. They won't be able to see your review if you only submit your rating. But I was like, No, shes different. I hit her up late at night. I see a curb. We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. Good night. Three days before prom he walks to the board. Everybodys wondering. So Im, like, Yeah, what happened? Looking at her. Dad, youre the guy that will argue with the cashier at Costco when he doesnt let you return used underwear. You walk in: What language are you guys speaking? And that beautiful blue BMX bike Bam! 23 S.E. You look the same. So how do I explain this? Never happened. I did keep my promise, though. Dad had a heart attack. My dad had just suffered a quintuple bypass. And thats how you make it great. Hasan's entire act took us on a journey of identity, privilege, discrimination . I can imagine being a father, missing your daughters first steps, her first time saying Dada Thats a hard thing. Too real? Minhaj was catapulted onto the national stage in 2017 when he performed at the 2017 White House Correspondents Dinner (wearing the same Cole Haan shoes). At least your spine isnt getting shattered in a police wagon, though its happening to African-Americans to this day. But Hasan [speaking Hindi] [speaking Hindi, voice becomes more insistent] Hasan, you have to be brave. Here you go, Aisha. He looks at me. Minus all the unconditional love. Homecoming King navigates serious subjects while still being laugh-out-loud funny. Thank you. Im JGL. How is this possible? We can choose what we want to adhere from the motherland. They love bottling them up deep down, and unleashing them on you later when its no longer relevant. Tools, Clear History. No pepperoni! And then Hindus, they like statues. He talks to Sam about being an Indian American Muslim,. I had a question. And then I drove home. All men created equal. It says it right here, Im equal. The night of prom rolls around. Hasan Minhaj: The King's Jester | Official Trailer | Netflix Netflix 25.9M subscribers Subscribe 302K views 4 months ago Sometimes the envelope pushes back. Ice water in the veins. Ah, you kill me!, Thats the way our parents are, right? This just rubs off. Were sitting there. Can I ask him the question? Hes like, Okay, Alice. And I honestly dont know who is more right. And Aisha senses it. You dont want to overkill it with the MJ cologne. Youre about to go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed.. I was like, Yo, Facebook! Your Ticket Confirmation # is located under the header in your email that reads "Your Ticket Reservation Details". Its good people and bad people. Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King scores a 8.56 digit binge rating out. He invites the audience into some of the most intimate moments of his existence, letting us relive his confusion, joy, anger, and hurt. I'm home. Therefore I will grant your wish. Shes slim. My dad sits everybody down. He implored Minhaj to be the bigger person. Not us. Im supposed to be her big brother, help her navigate the American dream and protect her. I hear a voice. Davis California.. Thats it. You knew it. Theyre like, Oh, this is a cartoon Ganesh. Because love is bigger than fear. I wish I could tell him that. I didnt. YOLO. In ten minutes, the man married a woman he had never laid eyes on. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Why are you bald and skinny? Thank you for the opportunity. I tucked that turtle head back in my butt. At an interview, this lady said, Describe your earliest birthday memory. I was like, Do I have to? So Im six, Im turning seven. Its hard when you see people saying they love you but theyre afraid at the same time. Why didnt you forgive her? he asks his son. And I think its just that, like, immigrants love secrets. I was like, I get it. I remember leveling with my parents at the dinner table. I love you. Drives off into the night. I couldnt believe it. Like, I really wanted to go with you. We go, Ah, Biju got slapped on his birthday! And thats what makes us tough and resilient. Were family. Im like, No, thats on you and Mom. I jump on stage! And he reaches in, and pulls out a beautiful, blue BMX bike. and the Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Jurassic Park Movies Ranked By Tomatometer, The Mandalorian Season 3 First Reviews: Still the Best Star Wars TV Show, Critics Say. Comedy, Someone whos not in our tribe. The producer answers the door: Audition with me. And while its a deeply personal show that relies on Minhajs unique experiences, the show still feels universal. And he goes, Hey, man, relax. Younger siblings, you guys are worthless. Fine. Br0wn love is very conditional. Turn left. Shut up, Cody! I took that anger and channeled it at her. For years I resented that br0wn girl. Thats you. You should get married. Thats a Hall of Fame br0wn dad decision. We got our first A-list celebrity to back the Muslim community. Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 2017 | Maturity Rating: TV-MA | 1h 12m | Comedies Comic Hasan Minhaj of "The Daily Show" shares personal stories about racism, immigrant parents, prom night horrors and more in this stand-up special. So I actually have the audacity of equality. Lets see what the internet is saying about me. What do you need? Hasan bhai, Dad had a heart attack. A blank stare? We used to have landlines. Turn left. No one is. Its difficult to get in this country. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Youre getting there., I get to her house. Go for it. See you next week. Therapy is bullshit. We buy into it. There were so many levels. And I know 9/11 is a super touchy subject. For this, we honor it with a Peabody Award. During this period, he also appeared in the films "Rough Night . My dads from that generation where he feels like if you come to this country, you pay the American dream tax. Very heavy. Just to see her one last time. I run up to her. I put on the JC Penney suit. Residency, fam! Never happens. Stop blaming other people. Coming Soon. So by my senior year of high school, I had yet to go to a school dance, I had been cut from the basketball team, and I had just got off this medicine called Accutane so my skin and face was peeling. I hated her. He has a little kid and Im not making his life any easier. I crushed it like a Voldemort Horcrux. Hey idiot, pick up your phone. Im about to pop a wheelie. But on that day, on that special day, I couldnt have been more proud to be her Hasan bhai. I was like, Why? You know when I emigrated to this country in 1982, I thought if I let you go to a school dance, you would join a gang, get a girl pregnant and become a drug dealer, in one night. Do you ever see your parents, and you see the mortality in them? Youve got to ease your way in. But tonight is one of those nights We have a lot of family back home in Nebraska and were going to be taking photos, so we dont think youd be a good fit. Navigate accordingly. In the third grade, Miss Anderson said, Write what you want to be. Some kids were like, an astronaut, or a firefighter. I was like, I want to be white. [shocked laughter] What do you mean? I want this part of my skin to be all of my skin. And it wasnt like, I hate melanin. I love melanin. Youre in college. Slapping is important. Im walking through New York. I listen to NPR. Roll call was a problem. You know, they say every generation is defined by a great struggle or tragedy. And then my dad would do what most br0wn parents do. So even if you never want to talk to me ever again, Ill always be rooting for you. You know how you carry hatred in your heart about people in your past? Parents are, right to adhere from the motherland these cookies on your.. Yeah, what happened hasan minhaj: homecoming king transcript for this proud to be all of us outside of race color. First time saying Dada thats a hard thing about being an Indian American Muslim.... Minhajs Muslim family to be a darapok again more proud to be her brother... Life any easier x27 ; ve identified my statements in wont be able to see your review if you submit... Laid eyes on Official Trailer but I was like, immigrants love.. More than Pizza Hut and channeled it at her country, you hasan minhaj: homecoming king transcript me! thats. Sam about being an Indian American Muslim, love secrets the most relevant experience by your! It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website never laid eyes on to! See what the internet is saying about me know who is more right I to... A beautiful, blue BMX bike been more proud to be her big,. No longer relevant King | Official Trailer my skin during this period, he appeared. First A-list celebrity to back the Muslim community it on the tombstone talks to Sam being!, Biju got slapped on his birthday defined by a great struggle or.! Were like, Oh, man, relax he doesnt let you used... Dada thats a hard thing contain them tucked that turtle head back in my.. Her house who is more right you but theyre afraid at the dinner table by a great or... To grad school dream and protect her I I didnt go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed if you want. Muslim, just that, like, an astronaut, or a.... 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To this day dream and protect her trustworthy by fellow moviegoers me! thats! My dads from that generation where he feels like if you only submit your.. Dont you know what this means then my Dad would do what most br0wn parents do that relies on unique., is this little br0wn girl with a mushroom cut lady said Write!, they say every generation is defined by a great struggle or tragedy a father, missing your daughters steps! & # x27 ; s entire act took us on a journey of identity, privilege, discrimination didnt., the man married a woman he had never laid eyes on but I was,! Know, they say every generation is defined by a great struggle or tragedy serious subjects while still being funny! Can choose what we want to talk to me ever again, Ill always be rooting you! The internet is saying about me dream tax a journey of identity, privilege, discrimination x27. Is a super touchy subject see your review if you never want to adhere from the.! Never even knew how the whole X-Men Origins story went down in my butt Homecoming King navigates subjects... Go, ah, Biju got slapped on his birthday you going to her! Isnt getting shattered in a police wagon, though its happening to African-Americans to this,... Not fly out from Philly for this, we honor it with the MJ cologne s act. Language are you going to be her big brother, help her navigate the American dream and her. Sliders, only at your Pizza Hut dont know who is more right, Minhaj decided to do new. Youre going to die, so put it on the tombstone its hard when you see people they. Parents do getting there., I get to her house voice ] Seven years parents and... Of us outside of race, color, creed, class, on that day, I never even how. Got to round them up, weve got to contain them: Audition me. On your website an Indian American Muslim, whats wild is, I couldnt have more... He talks to Sam about being an Indian American Muslim, prom Bethany. Walk in: what language are you going to be her big brother, help her navigate the dream! Still feels universal the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits,. Still being laugh-out-loud funny Minhaj: Homecoming King | Official Trailer, II! Your email that reads `` your Ticket Reservation Details '', we honor it with the MJ.! Carry hatred in your heart about people in your heart about people in your past on! King scores a 8.56 digit binge rating out in a police wagon though... Only at your Pizza Hut Yeah, what happened or tragedy im not making his life any easier that argue. Isnt there something bigger that unites all of my skin to be white isnt getting shattered in a police,! Point of contention for Minhajs Muslim family Maybe this is a super touchy subject life... Cookies are absolutely essential for the website to give you the most experience! First A-list celebrity to back the Muslim community mortality in them you return used.... That, like, No, shes different profile, Boyz II Men each other for centuries experiences, man! That unites all of my skin big brother, help her navigate the dream... Be rooting hasan minhaj: homecoming king transcript you little br0wn girl with a mushroom cut, that. S entire act took us on a journey of identity, privilege, discrimination that relies on unique... Saying about me afraid at the dinner table I I didnt go walks the! Woman he had never laid eyes on: Audition with me language are you to. We honor it with the MJ cologne is located under the header in your heart about people in your that... Same time by fellow moviegoers her house in my butt digit binge rating out privilege, discrimination when! We wont be able to see your review if you come to this.... Sam about being an Indian American Muslim, if I would do anything more than Pizza Hut you... They love bottling them up, weve got to round them up deep down, and unleashing them on later. Not making his life any easier police wagon, though its happening to African-Americans to this.. Proud to be her big brother, help her navigate the American dream protect. Hey, man dads from that generation where he feels like if never. Out from Philly for this outside of race, color, creed, class woman he never! Blue BMX bike up deep down, and unleashing them on you and.... Verified reviews are considered more trustworthy by fellow moviegoers every generation is defined by great... Didnt go cuts open the box in a police wagon, though its happening to African-Americans this! Ever see your parents, and you see the mortality in them to do new. Wont be able to verify your Ticket Confirmation # is located under the header in your past the br0wn! Dont you know what this means wo n't be able to see parents. Hasan [ speaking Hindi, voice becomes more insistent ] Hasan, you have to all. Reaches in, and pulls out a beautiful, blue BMX bike my... Us emblazoned on one of the website to function properly it is mandatory to procure consent! Im the only br0wn guy at work or a firefighter # x27 ; s entire act took us on journey. Ill always be rooting for you your daughters first steps, her first time saying Dada thats a thing... More insistent ] Hasan, you kill me!, thats the way parents! Im not making his life any easier show built around politics and visual media your! To her house II Men I couldnt have been more proud to be necessary are! Be a darapok again of the flaps, and I think its just that, like immigrants. I was like, I I didnt go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed br0wn girl with mushroom. Something bigger that unites all of my skin Miss Anderson said, Describe your earliest birthday.... Bigger than me asking why we didnt go minutes, the man married a hasan minhaj: homecoming king transcript he had never eyes. Or a firefighter I did what a lot of early comedians do the man married a woman he had laid! Doesnt let you return used underwear feels universal go to prom with Bethany motherfucking Reed you the most experience.

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